Sperm Donors Anyone??

I suddenly wanted to have my own child. How to do that is still a question I cannot answer as of this writing.

We were doing a set with the songs from the movie Mama Mia and I was tasked to sing the song “Slipping Through My Fingers”. As I am relatively young, I am not familiar with the ABBA songs aside from Winner Takes it All and the all-time videoke favorite Dancing Queen. I needed to listen to the song for half a day before becoming confident that I can sing it in front of a crowd.

The Slipping Through My Fingers song is one of those sounds that you wish today’s generation of music can produce. It has some depth and real emotions to it. It is not just about the storytelling but it is more of the fact that all the lyrics were perhaps carefully thought to carry meaning on it’s own.

I cannot help but feel emotional after realizing what the song is all about. I initially thought it is all about a broken love and the art of letting go but it is much more than that. The song is all about those parents who watch their children mature and go on their own. Almost all my siblings are gone out of the house and pursuing our separate lives. Only two remain and are bound to follow suit after finishing college.

I never realized that parenting could be that emotionally taxing- raising someone and then watch him or her go sometimes without even the simplest gesture of gratitude. It is never an excuse that my mother is a teacher and that she is used to nurturing people and then watch them go.  No amount of preparation will ever make one ready.

I believe what matters most will not be that feeling of pain of getting left behind but more the feeling of fulfillment and pride of having raised a child. What more if those kids accomplished a lot in life. I will not pretend to be aware of the intensity of that feeling of pride. No pain and no gain it maybe but the rewards far outweigh the necessary disadvantages. For that I am willing to take the risk and explore the happiness brought about by parenthood.